Wednesday 15 July 2020

ShaDe: I Am Number Four

I grew up without a person to talk to.
My secrets stay with me. 
There's no one to turn to when my mind was filled with so much painful thought.
Everyday, I walk with stronger feet. 
Hoping that all burden will be washed away. 
And my mind would be free from those lousy screaming.

There's always a time when I feel the need to have a confidante.
To speak all the words that has been trapped under this throat. 
A shoulder to cry on, 
Hands to wipe every drop of my tears,
An advice that makes me smile, 
And be happy for a while. 

I've been looking for a way to stop feeling sorry for myself. 
But I end up crying in my sleep.
So I took a simple leap,
Running and jumping on my hip.
Avoiding all those flips.

I'm still here, alive.
Standing and making decisions on my own,
Escaping from all the lighted path that I need.

Jealous, is a word I could hear from my tongue.
I am jealous of the hugs they gave to the dogs and puppies 
While my heart is full of cuts.
I am jealous of the chokers they put on the kitties necks 
While I'm wearing all these invisible bruises.

These running blood means nothing.
And being a number four is so tiring.

©shadelight.blogspot.com (2020)

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